Malaysia's First "Space Tourist" Wasted Money?

I posted this way back in 2007 in another blog. Somehow my blog got eaten by the interweb monster, so I am reposting it again from memory, or whatever I can remember.

I was feeding my fishes, feeling calm, ruminating on the Tao today while listening to the sound of Mythbuster busting some myth on tv. Then, during an advertisement break, I heard about Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor and the space program.

Now many people heard about this guy and how many millions of Malaysian taxpayer money he wasted when he was sent into space. Or.. did he? Hmmm. Since I just mentioned Mythbuster, let us bust this rumour, Mythbuster style!

Myth 1: Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor is really an astronaut, he is not a space tourist.
Mythbuster Alpha: Well this one is kinda easy to disprove. The term astronaut are similar to "Argonauts". What are Argonauts? Well, Argo is a ship. Argonauts - in ancient Greek - literally means "Argo sailors", or people who sail on the Argo. Now fast forward a few thousand years into the future. What are astronauts? Well, astro means star in Greek. So, astronauts, literally means "Star sailors", or people who sail on the stars. So, did Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor sail on the surface of a star? You bet your ass he didn't! If he did, he would be burnt to a cinder and wouldn't be coming back to give RM$8,000 talks per hour in school! Our verdict? BUSTED!
In future Mythbuster:Alpha-Male episode we will also prove why Charles Simonyi, Richard Garriot, and Superman are not real astronauts. News Flash : Nuklearman, as far as Alpha-Male know, is the one and only real astronauts in the world. He was born on the surface of a star called Sol, aged to adulthood in a few hours and came back to earth to whack Superman.

Myth 2: Malaysia wasted 20 million dollars to send Muszaphar to space.
Mythbuster Alpha: Again, this is easy to disprove. The money trails are so easy to follow that this myth can be debunked as easily as shooting a whale in a barrel. Malaysia did not spend a single cents to send Muszaphar to space at all. Yes, the program to send Muszaphar into space is actually free! Why? Well, he was included as part of a package by Malaysia to spend one billion dollars to purchase 18 technologically outdated, obsolete, defective, and dangerously dilapidated Sukhoi 30-MKM fighter jets. Our verdict? BUSTED!
Why Malaysia Ministry of Defense approved the purchase of obsolete and technologically defective products will be covered in future episode of Mythbuster : Alpha-Male.

Yes, Malaysia is full of fucked up liars and idiotic sheeps. Agriculture Ministry parliamentary secretary Rohani Abdul Karim was replying on behalf of the Science, Technology and Innovations Ministry. Through this idiotic sheep of a woman our Science, Crap, and Copycat Ministry, we are now playing batu seremban and gasing, painting batik and pulling the tea aka teh tarik in space, instead of staying grounded and designing a Single Stage To Orbit (SSTO) vehicle. Malaysia Boleh!